FINAL+Draft+(FINALLY!)

=Say What?=

By: Erika Flores, 9E
As I swam the last of the remaining laps of the pool, my body surging with pain, all I could think of was: hold up just a little longer until I reach the finish! When I finished I pulled myself out of the water, my body shaking like an old lady. At that moment I had this strong feeling inside of me, and already a tough decision had formed in my head, one that I have never thought of facing before. I am not the kind of person to give up, and I strongly believe in the saying, "Don't give up and finish what you start!" But after this day of training how to swim, I renewed my thoughts on this belief. Don't give up and finish what you start, but never on anything that’s hurting you.

It was my first day, and first time, of joining swimming! There were no other swim lessons we could find that didn’t teach baby stuff like blowing bubbles or holding your breath under water, except this one. This class was for swimmers who could already swim, and they taught the class the HARD CORE way. But I didn’t know of this little detail until I started swimming, NONSTOP. On the outside, it didn’t seem like anyone was the type to swim. But as soon as we hit the pool, they were so accustomed to the pool it seemed as if swimming was a big part their life, like water is to a fish. Well, we are from a surfing city, after all. But I swear, the kids were using all their muscles and taking up a lot of energy that you can hear everyone panting and gasping for breath in that pool room. I could even smell two times more of the chlorine in the air, since everyone was spraying H2O everywhere. They almost seemed somewhat inhuman. Or maybe it was just that they had something that I lacked, which was pace; pace in their breathing and pace in their stroking, exerting equal amounts of energy with each swim technique. You should have seen them; they were tearing through the water like maniacs, stroking like crazy, splashing water everywhere, making a mess, getting me soaked, and especially getting my heart rate going of nervousness.

I watched tensely as each person paddled off, one by one. When it was my turn to lap the pool, I didn’t realize until now that my body was shaking. “No matter,” I thought, “Well, here goes!” I pushed off the wall for a supporting start, and I was off! By the eighth lap, I was already drained of energy; My legs were stretched to their limit, thighs pounding with agony, ears and nose filled with chlorine water, arms burning from using the backstroke the whole time for almost two hours, all the while gasping for air, twisting my neck to keep my head up, and desperately trying to catch up to the others. I was lagging behind, slowing down with exhaustion. I struggled to gather the last of my strength to keep pushing forward, keep moving at least.

When class finally ended, earlier than supposed to in fact, I was so happy! It was difficult to get dressed in the changing room with my whole body burning up and fragile. Since we were let out early, the buses couldn’t take us home until later. So I bought two juice drinks and sat in the waiting lounge with my friend. She, too, was in pain of the swim class, so we were complaining for a bit about how we can’t move our arms and legs, until I came out and said, “Hey, Candice, what do you think about swimming? Why did you join?” As she took a sip of her juice, she said, “Well, I love swimming! And this is actually my first time in an after school sport, too!” I shifted in my seat, even cringed at the word “swimming”. “Me too,” I started, shifting some more in my seat, not knowing how to express my feelings. “But, do you believe in the saying ‘never give up’? I do, but after this first practice, I think, in my case, it should be more like ‘never give up, unless it’s killing you. This class is just too ... extreme for me. I don’t think I can keep going on with it.” But what I really wanted to say directly was that I wanted to quit. But how could I say that? I’ve never said those words in my life, nor will I, even at this moment. Whenever I thought about it, I never say “quit”, I always do the “run around” because quitting is never my thing.

We just sat there; talking, listening, chilling. Her, listening to my dad’s football story, that was exactly like my situation with swimming, and me, telling the story of how my dad prepared himself for the football team when he was in college and was given these signs from up above during just the first practice to discontinue or it’ll further harm him. I told her how my scenario was just the same and how I strongly believe I should discontinue myself, because I know it will further harm me as well. She says I should at least give it a try for two more weeks, “You’ll never know what’ll happen,” she says. I nodded, yet at the same time I objected, knowing in my heart I want to and should quit.

Later that night as I paced my room before bed, I thought of a few reasons why I should withdraw. I was deep in thought, and have come up with that I should actually learn and practice how to swim first before joining a group that already knows what they’re doing. I was hoping, deeply hoping, the coaches would let me go and praying everything would run smoothly. I was imagining going to their office to have a talk and saying, “I strongly want to drop swimming since it’s a class suited for more experienced swimmers, which I’m not. I know, in time, I will become a strong swimmer, but I can’t achieve that unless I learn how to swim the right way, at my own pace. If I keep going on like this I’ll never learn. I know I sound like a quitter, but I’m normally not one to just quit. I’m more of someone who will start something and finish it. But after this first practice, I changed my former belief to: ‘Don’t give up and finish what you start, but never on anything that’s hurting you’. Even though good role models always say ‘never give up’ or ‘quitting is not an option’, I have also thought about this saying, ‘Sometimes the wisest choices are the ones that don’t always follow a modeling quotation’. And believe me, it is very hard for me to bring myself to say ‘quit’.”

After a tough, restless night full of thoughts, I have decided to withdraw TODAY. ‘It would be scary, but I have to set them straight and get on with my life,’ I thought as I strode to their office. I stopped right in front of the door and took a deep breath, rehearsed what I was going to say, rapped on the door and came in. “Mr. Wobt? I have something to tell you,” I started. “Alright. Well come on in and have a seat,” he said, and gestured me to take a seat in an empty chair. I took a seat and cleared my throat. “I .. Would like to pull out of swimming...” I started out, expecting objection, but after I got only silence, I continued more calmly, “It’s just not working for me. I would like to continue, believe me, but if only I had better skill. So I’ll just stay out of the water for the time being until I’ve actually learned how to swim, the right way, at my own pace. So for now, I’ll just do something else, something that’s also fun!” After an awkward silence, he finally said, “Well, if that’s really what you want... You were doing well, though, and I can see your swimming skills are in there, you just gotta keep working, you know? Well it was great being your coach for a day!” He raised his arm up and gave me high five. ‘Wow,’ I thought as I took the high five with pleasure, ‘That was easier than I thought. Guess I didn’t need the whole speech after all.’ I thanked him for being my coach for a day. He laughed. I left his office without another word.

Even though it was only one practice, I have learned that if you continue to do something that is giving you harm, all that will come out of it is suffering. So it is always the best choice to drop something that will put you in danger than to keep going on with it and suffer, no matter how much you hate being a quitter. But I can’t always help thinking of that swimming incident whenever I put myself in a similar commitment. When I sign up for other sports and arts, like drama or basketball, I always get flashbacks of enduring that pain and wonder if I will be up for the commitment of this next pastime. But I also always ensure myself that I can do it and I will have fun! If I had continued swimming classes and hadn’t changed my beliefs then I would surely have been living in pain for a long time, physically and mentally, whether I was in or out of the water. I believe I had made the right choice of quitting, no matter how heroic it sounded to keep going and not give up on the class. I would have shriveled!