DOLQ3+Ryan


 * Art of Styling Sentences**

Page 55. 1. I am sure I got an "A," the grade I really had worked for. 2. The most popular, nice, pretty: Hanaha Montana. 3. The class elected the handsome guy as treasure: Jim Rutledge. 4. The best and awesome award: for the nicest, the most coveted of all in the countries distinctions.

Page 52. 1. Your grandmother was right: there is nothing new under the sun, nothing cool under the sun, only shadows are under the sun. 2a. But these numbers tell only part of the story, only a little bit of the story, only a short summary of the story. 2b. (Rewrite the same sentence but this time repeat the word part.) But these numbers tell only part of the story, part of the story, part of the summary of the story.

Page 43. 1. If your teacher says to read it twice, if your friends tell you to play, or if your parents tells to do homework, you'd better follow your teacher's wishes rather than your friend's. 2. When the astronauts saw the fire, when the astronauts heard the explosion, when the air controller fell asleep, then the flight crew were alarmed. 5.The basketball coach shouted that the referee didn't call a foul, that the other coach was not a good coach, and that the other players were hurting our players. Own. When the rain started to fall, when the sun didn't come up, when the snow started to fall, then I was sad.

Page 23. 3. Refreshed, cooled, barren, the winner left the stadium feeling great. 4. The children gathered around the teacher, laughing, talking, joking. 5. When the game was canceled, the rowdy spectators at the ball game screamed, yelled, left angrily.

2/10/10 Twenty two Students should have done the following: read My "Last Duchess" and the book __Candide__ and they should have written a ten page paper.

Page 24, and 1 on page 25 I believed that the writing was pretty successful but not perfectly because I had some trouble what it was saying in the beginning. I don't think the writing can be broken up.

Page 27. My sister prefers oranges, peaches, kiwis, mangoes than banana. Ryan enjoys playing soccer in spring baseball in summer hockey in winter and football in fall rather than sleeping trough out the seasons.

2/5/10 Carlos told Peter that they need to finish their French lesson quickly so they time for class.

Page 33. 1. Hardware, software, a modern- is what I make my money off of. 2. Poetry and music, painting and sculpture, drama and dance- is what I do when I have free time.

Page 39. 2. Tom and Jerry (my dog and cats) always make the house in a mess. 3. My favorite colors- red and white- always attract me to new clothes. 4. Learning the basic skills- stretching and exercising- will help me succeed in any sports. 5. A quick (plant shutdown) shocked the whole community.

3/10/10 Patterns 1-7: Both paragraphs listed below incorporate the patterns studied thus far, however, one of them uses the structures more effectively.

Greening buds, patches of mud, scattered puddles, a birth of color -- spring was on its way. Noel always found this season to be the ripest: thoughts of change and potential circulated through her body. But what made this spring more anticipated than the last? Perhaps it was the knowledge that she was going to be moving back home at the end of the school year. Or perhaps it was the warming air or extra chatter at home or one of a million other things. Whatever it was, she knew this spring was special; it really was going to be a season of change.

Greening buds, patches of mud, scattered puddles, a birth of color -- spring really was on its way. Noel always found this season to be the ripest: knowing of the changes that would soon be thrust upon her made her feel a certain tie to the fruit trees that were just beginning to show their blossoms. She too would be plucked from her current home and shipped off to some far off place (Instead of saying she too just say she). Her endpoint: Lincoln, Nebraska (Instead of Her endpoint: Lincoln, Nebraska should say Her endpoint was Lincoln Nebraska). The plum's endpoint: who knew. It could have been Nebraska or Melbourne or Brittany or Johanesburg. But this was not the first time she had started over on some other side of the world, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. She had learned to look for the small beauties amidst these times of transition, and she knew these harbingers of spring would always find her no matter where she moved.

1. Which would you say is better? Support your answer with specific instances from the text. I would say that the first one is better because it uses the patterns better than the second one. Also, the first one is more concise; it is simple and it doesn't try to make it all fancy. The second however, uses the harder patterns and makes it harder to understand. The second one tries to elaborate it more which makes it seem that it is reapeating itself.

2. With the paragraph you decided wasn't as good as the other, then make at least two changes to that paragraph which would improve it.